Secrets to a happy marriage

When I was at one of the boyfriend's coworkers house, he told me his secrets for a happy marriage.  It's amusing.

1. Name your kids what your wife wants to name them.
2. Live where your wife wants to live.
3. You only need to be great on 6 days.  The rest you can get away being good.  Those days are (in no particular order since they are ALL important): 
1. Valentine's Day
2. Wedding Anniversary
3. Christmas
4. Thanksgiving
5. Wife's Birthday
6. Mother's Day
7. Mother in Laws Day.  (He said it was more important for the mom to like you than the dad.  I think both are important personally.)  

You're welcome.  

Starbucks

On the Starbucks bag it says if you recycle the bag at a Starbucks
location you can get a free tall coffee.

The fine print: free tall coffee with purchase.

Nothing is free.

Names

This is what it says about my name on urbandictionary.com.  Pretty funny and awesome.  

1. Individual and artistic, a Justine usually doesn't give a crap about what anybody thinks of her.
Innovative and sincere, a Justine is a jack of all trades and appears to succeed in all that she puts her mind to or at least appear to. ;)  Thus, insecure people will either hate on a Justine just for breathing or feel safe under a Justine's wing. ( due to a Justine's natural paternal nature)

 

"Oh my god, did you see Justine today? She always looks good without even trying! I HATE her sometimes..."
"I can't do that! Why don't we ask Justine, she's supposed to be really good at that kind of stuff, right?"
"Man, it isn't a party until Justine walks through that door!"

 

2. Goddess that looks after guys getting drunk in their basement, and keeps them from dying.
Also provides a local taxi service. 

3. Honest, down-to-earth girl. Blonde but doesn't have the stupidity commonly associated with them. Dates older guys because of advanced maturity. Much unlike definition number 3, yet the dating is, in fact, true due to aforementioned state of high maturity.

 

4.  A vibrant girl, who's very easy on the eyes. She's the kind of girl every guy wants to be with. She's someone you want to know even if only for a short time. She brightens up your day and leaves you wanting more. CAPTIVATING and SELF ASSURED.

 

Pretty awesome. 

Friends

If you are blessed with having good friends thank them.  

So to all my friends: thank you for making my life that much richer by being the awesome people you are! 

Respect for ourselves guides our morals; respect for others guides our manners. - Laurence Sterne

 If I can only give you one piece of advice it would be to be respectful of yourself and others and to never compromise your morals.  You can make compromises, which is good to do, life needs comprise. However, if someone asks you to dishonor your beliefs they are not friend and most likely foe.  Someone who loves you would never ask you to do such a thing.  Someone who loves you would have the respect for these deep held beliefs that are a critical element in the basis of you.  They would go out of their way to make sure they are respecting your needs above their own base, momentary desires.  There is a reason we learn manners as a child and develop personal moral codes as we grow.  They have impact. 

Our new couch!

How much should you really exercise?

I found this article from healthywomen.org to be informative:

Q: I work a lot of hours and just can't seem to find time to work out more than one day a week. If my exercise routine is limited to one day a week, what are the best exercises for me to explore? What exercise will give me the greatest return?

 

A:  It's helpful to think in terms of physical activity, not exercise. Many people think they don't have time for exercise but are surprised to realize how much they can increase their daily physical activity outside of an official "exercise routine." That boost, even in small amounts of time, pays off for your body.

To maintain health, the national guidelines for physical activity set forth by the American College of Sports Medicine and the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) recommend adding 30 minutes of moderate-intensity activity (brisk walking), five or more days per week, or 20 minutes of vigorous intensity activity (running), three or more days per week. If you want to lose weight, you will need to burn an additional 500 to 700 calories per day.
Think this would take up a lot of time? Relax! You don't need to find a free half-hour. Research shows that you will gain the same benefit if you complete the daily activity in three 10-minute bouts. Here are great moderate and vigorous activities that take only 10 minutes and can be incorporated into your day:

• Jumping rope
• Gardening or raking
• Dancing
• Brisk walking or jogging
• Vacuuming
• Stair climbing or marching in place
• Push-ups and sit-ups
• Jumping jacks
• Bike riding for errands or short commutes
• Incorporating activity into your workday—use the stairs instead of the elevator, walk to talk with co-workers instead of e-mailing, stand (it burns more calories) when you would usually sit

Push-ups may remind you of the terrors of high school gym class, but they're a terrific strength training activity for women that can be done at home (or almost anywhere else) easily, at your own speed. Try them for a 10-minute session:

• Lie on the floor, facing chest down. Put your hands flat on the ground, at shoulder level. Place your feet together and parallel. Throughout the push-up, always look forward and not down at the floor.
• Straighten your arms as you push your body up off the floor and exhale. Keep your body straight. Do not bend or arch your upper or lower back as you push up.
• For a classic push-up, balance in a straight line from your toes. If you have trouble with that, try a modified version: pivot up from your knees instead of your toes.
• Slowly lower your body until your chest touches the floor. If you are pivoting from your toes, keep your knees off the floor. For either position, keep your body straight and your feet together. Repeat.

If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can't "be friends". A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend. - Oprah

Rise - The Frames

  Breathing in the night
There's nothing else I'm needing now
The wind is at my side
And so you
Together we will rise
Above all these words and promises we couldn't keep
Together we will fly
Above it all now
But sometimes we will fall
From the light
But it shines on us tonight
Together we will rise
Together we will rise
Surely it's a sign now
That everything's in tune to some kind of higher plan
Yeah surely it's a sign
That you were right
There's this secret line
That we've been denied
And we're crossing it tonight
And together we will rise
And together we will rise
Sometimes we will fall
From the light
But it shines on us tonight
And together will rise
Past this light
And we'll cross it here tonight
And together we will rise

Positivity

I really do believe that good things happen to good people.  That if you think positive and work hard, you will be both benefited and rewarded.  It's the balance of life.  It makes sense after all. 

Truth

"Have you ever wanted something very badly then gotten it? Then you
know that winning is many things, but it is never the thing you
thought it would be."
- No One Belongs Here More Than You

Unthinkable (I'm Ready)

Without a doubt, my favorite song of the moment.  Alicia Keys is the woman.  

Moment of honesty

Someones gotta take the lead tonight
Whose it gonna be?
I'm gonna sit right here
And tell u while it comes to me
If u have something to say
U should say it right now

U give me a feeling that I never felt before
And I deserve it, I know I deserve it
Its become something that's impossible to ignore
And I can't take it
I was wondering maybe
Could I make you my baby
If we do the unthinkable will it make us look crazy
If you ask me I'm ready
If you ask me I'm ready

I know u said to me
"This is exactly how it should feel when its meant to be"
Time is only wasting so why wait for eventually
If we gonna do something about it
We should do it right now

U give me a feeling that I never felt before
And I deserve it, I know I deserve it
Its become something that's impossible to ignore
Its what we make it
I was wondering maybe
Could I make you my baby
If we do the unthinkable will it make us look crazy
Or would it be so beautiful either way I'm sayin
If you ask me I'm ready
If you ask me I'm ready

Why give up before we try
Feel the lows before the highs
Clip our wings before we fly away
I can't say I can't compare
I'm suspended it the air
Won't u come be in the sky with me

I was wondering maybe
Could I make you my baby
If we do the unthinkable will it make us look crazy
Or would it be so beautiful either way I'm sayin
If you ask me I'm ready
If you ask me I'm ready

Beef Wellington

I may not have had any water last night, but never fear.  I was still able to make this mock Ground Beef Wellington with the help of my lovely assistant, aka the boyfriend.

It was pretty damn good.  Only thing I would change is I wouldn't use their suggestion to cover the Wellington in their mushroom sauce.  I would incorporate all the sauce with the meat mixture and then make a mushroom gravy.  Also I would add more mushrooms to the filling.  Once I figure out the best way to make this recipee the most tasty I will update. 

This recipee honestly was so easy and would be great for a nice dinner party.

Recipe here. 

Precious and Yes Man

Two very different types of movies, but boy did I enjoy both.


Precious is by far one of the saddest and moving movies I have seen in a long time.  I had high expectations for the this film and generally when I have high hopes I tend to be disappointed.  This film far surpassed my presumptions. 


The acting is phenomenal.  

• Gabourey Sidibe is amazing in her breakthrough role.  She is real and relatable and you just want to wrap her in your arms.
• Mo'Noique plays one of the most dispicable characters I have seen in a long time.  Her relationship with Precious and her monologue at the end of the film brought me to tears.  
• Paula Patton, who I initally thought was Alicia Keys (oops), is amazing.  She is tender, kind.  Who knew she could act? (Remember Deja Vu with Denzel Washinton?  That was her.)
• Ditto for Mariah Carey who plays the social worker so well.  She is in a role where she is not all done up as we are used to seeing her and she is amazing.  No one can give her shit for Glitter anymore.  
• RN John was great and what makes the acting by this character even sweeter was that he was played by THE Lenny Kravitz.  I was blown away.  I'm pretty sure this was Lenny's first time professionally acting and he's got skill.  From one RN to another, if even fictional, I love the murses.  

If you have not seen Precious, I highly recommend it.  You will not be disappointed.  


Yes Man, on the other hand, was a film I thought would be nothing special, yet I was happily surprised.  It was entertaining and hilarious.  It's definitely a good comedy choice.  One of the better ones I've seen in a long while.  

Men's eyes were meant to look. Let them gaze. I will not budge for no man's pleasure.

Love

I'm supposed to be working out, but sometimes, supposed to can go out the window.  I think I'm still working with this acceptance concept.  The more I think about it, or perhaps not think about it and go with it, the more at ease I am with the environment.  I'm less concerned about me and what I may fail to do, and certainly less annoyed my others and their short comings.  I am exactly the way I'm supposed to be.  I'm healthy.  I'm blessed by wonderful people who love and support me.  I have a job in a poor economy.  I'm in a loving and supportive partnership.  There are things to thank the universe for.  Time to the enjoy the ride. 

But this is not where I wanted to go with my post.  

Long story short, YouTube sent me an email about a video I had posted.  So I follow the links because why would I get a virus?  Thankfully, the email was legit.  I started searching for videos instead of doing abs because I wanted to find a video posted with better visual quality than mine.  The audio wasn't as good, but with slam poetry, the entire presentation is important.  This is one of my favorite poems ever.  EVER! 

Love by Beau Sia

This made me chuckle

A group of senior citizens were talking over the breakfast table in a nursing home. "My arms are so weak, I can hardly lift this cup of coffee," said the first.

"Yes, I know," agreed the second. "My cataracts are so bad I can't even see my coffee."

"I can't turn my head because of the arthritis in my neck," said a third, to which several nodded weakly in agreement.

"My blood pressure pills make me dizzy," another went on.

"I guess that's the price we pay for getting old," winced an old man as he slowly shook his head.

"Well, it's not all bad," said one woman cheerfully. "At least we can still drive!"         

Tip

Once you're comfortable being by yourself, you learn to be more at
ease with others.

Acceptance

I'm going to take baby steps.

Today's topic: Acceptance

People try to control everything and in reality we can influence very little.  We try to build damns and the elements cause them to break.  We care so much what others think of us, but  if you think about it for a moment, it's rather pointless.  You will never know what goes on in the head of another.  You cannot read their thoughts.  You can think you perceive their inner thinkings from what you observe, but the reality is you can never really know what they are thinking even if they tell you I am thinking _____________ (fill in the blank as you desire).  So if someone says, "I love you"  accept it to mean they have affection for you.  "I hate you," then perhaps they are angry.  Take it for what it is and nothing more. 

Another thing in terms of acceptance.  It's important to remember that no one can control you.  Too easily do we give up our control for others.  You control your thoughts and feelings.  You are responsible for them, no one else.  Be responsible for yourself, take accountability.  By the same token, do not try to control another.  When you try to take someone's power, you are giving up your own control.  You become obsessed with their inner thoughts, feelings, and actions and in turn you are giving up your own power and control.  Your own moves and thoughts become dictated by the perceived notions of another.  And once again, you don't ever really know what goes on in another person's head. 

I guess one would deviate from hear and discuss the need to trust all.  This is not the point I'm going to make.  I think it is important to learn to accept that all you really can control is yourself, so be the best person you can.  Don't be fake, don't be cruel or mean.  Be loving, be compassionate, respect nature, family, and loyalty.  Live by laws of personal integrity.  On a simple level trust another when they tell you something.  By the same token, it doesn't mean that you should let people control you or be naive.  Perhaps just take life as it comes.  Be smart.